MMS 2- KNOWING YOU

Hello my lovelies! Y’all good?

If you’ve heard of the following, I want you to nod okay?

The 5 love languages, Enneagram type, the personality test and temperaments (melancholic, sanguine, choleric and phlegmatic).

One thing I’ve learnt about relationships so far is that a majority of the way you want to be loved is based on how you show love. That simply means that you need to really know yourself and be well informed about your personality, what you love, what makes you feel loved and what doesn’t. That way when God gives you your special someone, you know exactly how to teach them what makes you feel most loved. If you’re thinking it’s weird in anyway to tell the person you’re with what makes you feel loved, then you’re probably okay with living in frustration due to unmet expectations. There’s a book I read titled ‘The 4 Laws of Love by Jimmy Evans’ a few months ago and it was so good I read it twice. I highly recommend it. One of the major points the author made was this: imagine you and your partner were at an all-you-can-eat buffet table and were sitting across from each other. The catch is, at this table both your cutlery is too long to pick food and serve yourselves but long enough to pick food and serve your partner. Getting the picture? You can only get the food you ask for and your partner is the only one that can serve you what you would like. Just like Jesus taught us, by being a living example, a heart of service towards each other yields the most results. There a many personality tests out there but the ones I’ve listed above are the ones I’ve tried, liked and heard good reviews about. The five love languages give you an idea on how best you receive love or give love. They are words of affirmation, acts of service, receiving gifts, quality time and physical touch. The Enneagram, personality and temperament tests give an indication of your personality type, the strengths and weaknesses you may have and ways of handling those traits. Like everything else on Earth, these are not a hundred percent accurate but they come pretty close and do a good job of helping you understand yourself and others better.

The goal is to give you a starting point to learning more about yourself and your partner, as well as giving you conversation starters to have the necessary discussions needed to make you thrive as an individual and as a team. Send this post to them and get talking xx

These are the links to the tests I’ve mentioned above!

The five love languages test: https://www.5lovelanguages.com/quizzes/couples-quiz/ and there’s one for singles https://www.5lovelanguages.com/quizzes/singles-quiz/

The Enneagram test (I especially like this website because they have a Christian approach): https://assessment.yourenneagramcoach.com/

The Personality Test: https://www.16personalities.com/

The temperaments test: https://www.temperamentquiz.com/  

Side note: In-as much as we are all growing and learning and have traits we would like to change about ourselves, please endeavor to answer these questions as honestly as possible to give the most accurate results. On the other hand, please don’t let your results be the end-all be-all of your character. Always strive to be better with each passing day.

My results

• Love languages in order of highest score: 37% words of affirmation, 23% receiving gifts, 20% acts of service, 13% quality time and 7% physical touch

What does this mean?

Actions don’t always speak louder than words. If this is your love language, unsolicited compliments mean the world to you. Hearing the words, “I love you,” are important— hearing the reasons behind that love sends your spirits skyward. Insults can leave you shattered and are not easily forgotten. You thrive on hearing kind and encouraging words that build you up.

• Temperament: 70% Melancholic, 30% Phlegmatic

What does this mean in a nutshell?

I am sensitive, idealistic, and harmonious. I have high ideals and the perseverance necessary to accomplish my goals. I need alone time to recharge my batteries (intense social activities or large groups will stress me out) and I usually need motivation to get started on new projects. Once I begin, though, I will persevere to the end. Some strengths listed are: careful, cautious, orderly, particular, quietly passionate, serious, sensitive, studious, thorough, thoughtful. Some weaknesses are: critical, demanding, distrusting, judgmental, nitpicking, perfectionist, pessimistic, self-righteous, skeptical.

• My personality type: Defender

What does this mean?

A Defender is someone with the Introverted, Observant, Feeling, and Judging personality traits. These people tend to be warm and unassuming in their own steady way. They’re efficient and responsible, giving careful attention to practical details in their daily lives. Some strengths listed are supportive, reliable, patient, imaginative, observant, enthusiastic, loyal, hardworking, good practical skills. Weaknesses include humble, shy, taking things too personally, repress feelings, overload themselves, reluctant to change, too altruistic.

• My Enneagram type in order of highest score: Investigative thinker (type 5) and Entertaining optimist (type 7)

What does this mean?

Type Five is a person who pulls back from the world and others to observe and prefers to live in their mind. They may be wise, visionary, and knowledgeable; or abstract, stingy, eccentric, and intellectually arrogant. Type Sevens love to plan and anticipate positive future events. They enjoy having variety and multiple choices to choose from. They do not want to be limited, restricted, or bored. They may be well-rounded, affirming, and generous, or at their worst they can be self-focused, an escapist, and have an insatiable appetite for excitement.

After taking the tests please read the details of your score. A wealth of knowledge awaits you!

Proverbs 4:7 Wisdom is the principal thing; therefore get wisdom: and with all thy getting get understanding.